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What's wrong wit'cho legs, boy?

We're freaks. What can I say? I'm leaving my hotel this AM for a run to push on with za plan and as I am returning, some dude hauling boxes out of a truck to deliver to the hotel says: "What's wrong wit'cho legs, boy?"


When he says this, I am like that little boy with an array of mean kids standing in a circle around me all pointing to a pee stain on my Tough Skins. He continues on..."Wit doze lines, you see doze lines?" I' thinking to myself, "WTF old dude? They're tan lines...and quit looking at my legs" and then it clicks. We've got some weird body things going on as cyclists. As I ran up to the hotel, I was likely a shock to him as his words were to me. Cyclists are like T-Rex's with an even worse color scheme. Skinny arms and atrophied chests with freakishly huge legs. And add to this these fairly ridiculous tan lines and it's a friggin cartoon. Going to Mexico in March with the fam, I felt like that embarrassed little boy above. I go out to the pool and there are like euro studs with banana hammocks rocking full up Bain de Soleil tans (OK, there were plenty of rotund euro dudes too with said banana hammocks that made me laugh). Here comes the American dad! I saunter out to the pool with my t-shirt kept on with my baseball hat on low and towel around my legs.

Taking a step back, I guess it's all a matter of pride. We put the work in and change our bodies fairly dramatically and likely have permanently damage our skin with the 100's of hours we live out doors and 1000's of miles we turn the cranks. I guess I'll accept it...

Reader Comments (3)

you wear tall boys, but short shorts?

come on dude

May 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJared Roy


Those are my running shorts...andthey got all bunched up in my crack and such when I laid my wear ass down on my crappy hotel bed this AM after my run at the crotch of dawn. This said, I'm NOT gonna be one of those chump-o-matics who wears his favorite pear of long ass UNC basketball shorts to run for an hour in.

High socks. Proper running shorts (but not the girlie ones). That's the ticket, beeatchnikov!

May 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterGreg


email for morning SHRED-FEST.

bryan at slipstream sports dot com

May 8, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterbryan

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