I hear myself tell my legs on any given weekend "I hope you perform". But as we know, hope is not a strategy. It's a layer somewhere beneath luck, fitness, passion and ultimately skill that can help contribute to a great performance. But on its own, it's useless.
These day's I am finding my place in the crew. Finding my legs...and my head...as I continue 'the balance'. Everyone...and I mean virtually everyone!...is at this new level. Cross is a passion for all those who line up and their strategies are less 'hope', more 'drill it'. It's inspiring.
The place I see myself now and the place I need and want to be are not very far from one another. It's like looking across a small stream....one that you know you can leap across if you nail the jump just right. But you need to trust your legs and your spring to get across. This is precisely the situation I am in. That extra .0001% of effort to take a risk, bridge to where I need to be in the race and settle in.
Everyone is suffering. That needs to be remembered. It's about your ability to block out all doubt for the nanosecond it takes to put in an effort...one that with hanging doubt will never allow you to cross the chasm for fear of too many matches burned.
I can do it.
Training these days is less training and mostly tuning. Each race is its own stepping stone. The big blocks of the summer...early morning pre-work sufferfests to condition the body from long single speed rides to hour-long wattage-fests...was prescribed well. But now, the intensity of work and the need for my family to have a daddy and a husband far outweigh the selfish requirements that many are still putting themselves through to be at the razor sharp edge of the race.
Racing-->rest-->a Wednesday eye-bleed session-->rest-->racing. Eat well. Don't be afraid to have a beer. Sleep even harder. Secret sauces that help me carry on in the fall while my mind still carries me to victories, instigating my passion for the sport and the place I'd like to find myself. Never hoping I am there, always planning to be there.