I think it is time. Time for me to act like a cyclist again and crank up the monastic life I was leading up to approximately 11:56PM last night.

The evening began with a lovely dinner with best friends. The cocktails were flowing as were the conversations and laughter.
After the food epic and with a few liquid golds put back, someone said the word:

K-a-r-a-o-k-e.

Oh, God, the ugliness factor was high. We made our way over to the only gig in town and walked in amongst the true people of Spokane. The proverbial record basically scratched when we walked in the door. But after a few more liquid golds and whipping out my best Space Oddity, the crowd was mine.
The requests for encores came flooding in and of course I had to respond. It was essentially the American Idol for Idiots with me as the star pitted against Cristina The Lesbian and Chester the Vietnam Vet. A veritable battle of the stars. We rocked into the wee hours trading songs like bullets. Cristine throwing out some Indigo Girls, Chester with some Brick House and me with some classic faves. In the end, my wife witnessed me get picked up by the local Harper Valley PTA lady and I was the clear favorite for the lesbian contingent, out muscling their patron Cristina.

To the winner goes the spoils...

I am now ready folks. Stress relief in a bottle and a microphone. Exactly what was needed in my 'training'.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I hope everyone is getting their turkey on. Mmm. Protein. We're with our best friends in a cold and very scenic Spokane. The kids are going off playing with each other and our ladies are dialing a mad feast.

Well, it had to happen some time. Paradise needed to remind itself that it does in fact situate itself in the mountains. The pow pow came down last night after a final couple of days of absolute beautiful days in the sun.

The boys and girls will likely cross today...somewhere. 29'ers replacing cross bikes through the snow. Maybe Poormans, maybe long dirt road rides in place of parks and barriers.

Mr. KP sent me the latest on Master's Worlds (yes, I am STILL going!):

U.C.I WORLD MASTERS

CYCLO-CROSS CHAMPIONSHIPS 2008

SATURDAY 19th JANUARY 2008

ZILVERMEER MOL - BELGIUM

PROGRAMME

CATEGORIE DISTANCE START

Men (1943 and older) 30’ 10.03hr

Women (1958 and older) 20’ 10.02hr

Women (1959-1968) 25’ 10.01hr

Women (1969-1978) 30’ 10.00hr

Men (1944-1948) 30’ 11.02hr

Men (1949-1953) 30’ 11.01hr

Men (1954-1958) 30’ 11.00hr

Men (1959-1963) 40’ 12.00hr

Men (1964-1968) 40’ 13.00hr

Men (1969-1973) 40’ 14.00hr

Men (1974-1978) 40’ 15.00hr

What an inexplicable release. My dear friends, some new souls met, my single speed and deliciously epic, tight and twisty technical single track...at night...in a tunnel of light.

At work today, my head came close to exploding no less than 4 times. I literally was calculating what the anuyerysm woudl feel like when it happens. I was sort of hoping it woudl be quick and not hurt a lot. By 4:30 I am watching my watch. I'm in an executive meeting. We are announcing major changes and I all I am thinking of is that that I need to get going 'cause I am going to be late for hooking up with my boys! Joe is flying in from Spokane and Brian has a huge crew assembled including the awesome duo from Yeti, Ariel and Abby, former Boulderites now calling Santa Cruz their home and working for the Tribe.

We assembled at the Java Hut in downtown Fairfax CA....the Boulder of the West. I got there a 1/2 hour late and then Joe rips into the parking lot, family in tow, moments later, fresh out of Oakland Airport. Bri and the crew patiently waited for us for 45 minuets and Joe and I got ready and we jammed before 7PM. Team Yeti has bikes prepared for everyone, but I am going to roll the 1 x 1. I just love my own bike as tempting as those ASR's and 575's were....

We climbed and ripped Tamarancho and then traversed up and over into terrain I've never been on. Let's just say this was 'unmarked'.

My

God

Epic, cherry, technical single track. The tight and obscenely twisty stuff that you dream about....at night in a tunnel of light. An utter release after a week of mental torture. My dearest friends....my family in the Bay Area communing on the tight and twisty.

I miss you.

Bri and Ariel on the ascent.

Joe advertising

Brian selling the shit out of the Yeti experience

Abby loading the Yeti rig

ASR

Speed Buggy healing up after Achilles surgery

Ball as he is seen in his high powered biz dev role

In a New York minute, things can change. I'm back home after a trip away to NYC to see family and take care of some work. Things can change in the blink of an eye.

These last 4 days have my head spinning....

~Seeing family and old friends shows me how they...and I...have changed and life is not infinite but 50 years of marriage shows me that love can be.
~NYC is not the same City I once lived in. It's soft. There is no edge any longer.
~My work world showed me how quickly things can degrade for some people I've known and trusted for ages....and showed me what can occur if you do not make the right decisions.
~I'm home now and peering into my sons bedrooms tonight, they seem older. They're changing. Please stay the way you are my sweet boys. Show me again and again and again how you just learned how to ride a bike. Stay there for a little while longer.

I will lay my head on my pillow tonight and I will sleep soundly while I shouldn't. The past 4 days are in the front lobe of my brain firing synapses at such a furious pace I can almost physically feel them firing. Last night was restless. Hotel restlessness from being away from my loves and dealing with all this unrequested life education I just witnessed the last four days. The kind of restlessness where your eyes are open at 2 in the morning and you whip the covers off, drop your feet to the floor and put your head in your hands, the brain all tangled in knots in what if scenarios, contingency plans, the future, what's next, am I ready, will I do the right thing for my family, why isn't there a real crystal ball.

After learning most of the 'education' on Monday, I needed to suffer. Turn my mind on to channel zero and make the brain see nothing but channel zero's snow for a while. The suffering tends to make all life's noise stop....or turns it into 'white noise' as in snow on the television. I strapped on the shoes and got myself to Central Park on an epically beautiful evening. Clear blue skies, trees exploded in mad color. Commencing the run, channel zero could not be tuned in. 1/3 my brain was in overdrive thinking through things I've just learned while another 1/3 is causing me to half-smile as my eyes are seeing old treasures in the Park I haven't seen in years. Trails we used to poach and certain rocks we used to huck ourselves off of on big hit slalom bikes with Night Sun's blaring through those same trails during many nights, many years ago. the last 1/3 of my brain knows that this weekend 'cross is coming and for once I smiled about it while on the road....when typically it' s a stress. No more. Racing is racing and it's my salvation and cleansing from reality. My run through the park's single track made me feel like I was riding and that balanced the thrashing going on in my brain. I hopped trees like barriers until the legs were cached and I could go back to the anonymous hotel into my anonymous room and think some more.

I'm home. I'm lucky.

....and forty million miles from the sun. Or so the song goes. Perfect and ironic that it came on this AM on my shuffle as I continue putting in the work in the early morning air. Yesterday was still felt in my legs but the air was crisp and the determination was there. Beautiful. I threw the leg over the bike, hit play and rolled. The ride tore upon the healing muscles that helped me at least take back 11 places as I watched the race roll away. It was needed.

At the top of Lee Hill the song came on and the lyrics spoke to me. Again smiles. Did it fall apart before it all began? Easy to let the mind pour gasoline on itself and commit suicide. Rolling in the garage, my son heard the door rumble open. He comes flying out with a pair of ridiculously old Oakleys....no lenses.

"Did you not crash and win daddy?! Can we ride now!?"

What can I do? I'm the luckiest man on earth. Just stuck between the green grass and forty million miles from the sun.

The weather has dipped into the 50's and 60's and its blustery. It's welcoming us to the season. I am so amped I can't sleep well any more. The work has been put in and my family has supported me so much. I haven't smiled this much in a year. I'm ready to have fun and see what this aging body can do. I've listened.

Daaaaamn, this guy is starting 'em young. He converted this:

to this:

See the project HERE.

My main honky Brian ~Double B from Bakersfield ~ Bruckner, owner and proprietor of the notorious Big Swingin' Cycles shop in San Francisco is hosting the second annual Lion of Fairfax 'cross race in Fairfax CA. You can see some rad photos on my old friends Russ and Nancy Wright's AbbiOrca site here.

I wish I could get out there for this as it was a hellofalot of fun last year I heard. Most folks from the Bay Area will have already heard and registered for the race, but for my peeps out here in CO, I'd HIGHLY recommend swingin' by Big Swingin' in San Francisco. You'll quickly find that B, Chris and the whole staff are very core. Just remember that when you visit and want to cross it up with the fellas, you may want to pack a dress.

Good luck B!!!!